I usually ask him to put his feet under him and make an effort at standing up while I grab under both arms with my right foot planted between his feet. He is getting more sluggish and less helpful so pulling him up off the chair (he weighs almost twice as much as I do) is nearly breaking my back. I am afraid that this will be the cause to have to place him in extended care and have permanent damage to my spine. Any suggestions would be helpful.
I am grateful that my S/O is of average weight for his height.... but he feels he wants to trim down a bit just to make it easier later on in life. I'm not going to stop him :)
Buy an air mattress before you get into that situation. My light bulb went off in my head after about the second time this happened. I got out the queen-sized guest air mattress, placed it on a sheet, rolled him onto the mattress, dragged it using the sheet to an area where there was room to inflate, and presto! he was on a comfy bed for the remainder of the night. I later on found that our air mattress was about the same height as our sofa and I could roll him from the mattress to the sofa, get him into an upright position and start all over again with the lift to his wheelchair. Once I was so tired from the effort we just both camped out on the air mattress and got help the next morning. I could write a whole book on the humorous episodes of caregiving which at the time weren't so humorous.
Means no amount of body mechanics is going to save your back.
You either need equipment, or, more helpers, or, move him to a care facility.
Check your location to see if there are any medical equipment banks.
Check with your local or nearby hospitals.
Check with his Doc's office, ask about equipment, ask about getting a home-assessment of what's needed.
Sometimes Salvation Army, unless you can afford to buy new.
Check with medical supply places that deal in equipment.
But do not buy right away--shop around!
What one company says is the newest and greets, is not necessarily what might do best for you.
They often have personnel to come to your home, assess the situation, then recommend what might help best.
One difficulty with most lift equipment: it takes up so much room--if your house lacks ADA doors and floor-space, many of those lifts simply won't fit.
Might be better to seek furniture replacements that have lift-mechanisms in them.
I know that down the road she will ,be bedridden, and I will nurse her in bed, and see to all her needs.
We have every known aid known to man except actual hands. She has children living a few minutes away, but they have the notion that I am coping and so never offer to help.
You know how it, is: they have their own busy lives. :)
If you go thru an aggitation stage with him, get him on medication , he will be happier and so will you. What do you think a nursing home does, they do the same only they over-medicate. You can also call the fire dept for a lift off the floor, they are glad to help. I do not know what bed ridden means to some people. I was told my Mom is bed ridden. Ya, she would be, but I hoyer her up into her wheelchair, recliner, 2nd recliner on porch and back into bed. No one has to be bedridden in my book, unless its the very end and they are comotose I suppose.
We have to live our lives with our loved ones, and man its hard! Hire help if you can, even just for a morning bathing after getting them up, its a huge help! We even take my Mom on our vacations with us, we have to, no one will take care of her, so we go and make the best of it. For someone who has severe dementia and is in her 90's non verbal, she has a smile on ear to ear when we go away. God Bless them, they cant help it and we're all going to be there .