I moved in w/my mom 9 months ago. I have been shopping 1-2 times a week and she stays home w/her dog. I had spoken to someone at the Alzheimer's Assoc. and they apparently contacted social services due to our conversations. A social worker just showed up today for an hour asking lots of questions which I know she had to get the info from the Assoc. In addition to tons of handouts she presented one re: that if my mom goes out the door, gets lost, or hurt while I am gone (even though I race through the store) I can be prosecuted and given up to 7 years in prison! There is no family nor friends, etc. to stay here although she has managed fine on her own for 4 years. I am really scared of this. Does anyone have any experience or knowledge of this? We can't afford a person at $80, 4 hour min. to come in each time I need to shop. I also have personal things I'd like to do, but feel I cannot now. Any suggestions?
Geez, if leaving your charge alone for any length of time and they fall and injure themselves gets you put in jail, then lots of us caregivers would be in prison. Just yesterday, I had to lay down because of severe muscle spasms in my back, and while I was resting, my Mother fell in the kitchen. I heard a big bang and went looking for the source. I found my mother splayed out on the kitchen floor. She had tried to sit on the bench and missed, hitting her head too and getting a huge gooseegg in the process. So, someone is going to sue me for that? that would make caregiving an extremely hazardous occupation and many caregivers would begin to say "Uh, uh, no way am I going into that bear trap!" With this hyperbole, you can see the ridiculous of the threat for having left her along.
We live in a small island. You can drive around the island 40 mph within 2 hours. Despite our small island, we also have respite services. There are at least 2 programs here that is locally/federally funded (they split the funding). One program allows us to have 4 hrs a week. The govt caregiver comes and spends the whole morning or whole afternoon, and the cg can go shopping or do bills or go to the movies. What we did was instead of using up the 4 hours at one time, we asked if we could spread it out to 1 hour per day - 4 days a week - for them to come and sponge bath my bedridden parent. The Other Respite program, also gives me one hour respite + $60.00 for Me like a credit card to be used at the mall or massage, or movies + $60 of supplies (Depends, gloves, baby wipes, etc...).
So please call around. Try first the senior citizen department. They should be aware of most programs pertaining to the elderly/disability.
Try leaving her for really short times at first - 20 minutes - Have her "promise" to stay with her dog until you return. If that works go for 40 minutes....
I was caretaker for my husband for two years after his stroke until I could no longer do all the home care ( he was a large man and virtually helpless) and a nursing home was found. He did fall out of bed once but the ambulance was there before I could get back - he had pressed the emergency button!
Don't be "afraid" to ask for help.You deserve it and Mom might even enjoy a new face!
Good luck!
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